FML

Today, I asked my best friend why she didn't ask our other best friend Anna to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. She said, "She's too pretty. I need ugly bridesmaids to make me look better." I am the maid of honor. FML

Today, I was running outside. On the last mile I am along side some fields. While running along the side of the road I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML

Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

Today, I was walking in Walmart and this cute guy walked by me and winked. I thought he wanted to talk so I followed him around the store trying to catch up. Turns out it wasn't a wink, he had something in his eye. And he told the security person that a weird girl was stalking him. FML

Today, I brought some cupcakes to my class for my birthday, like all the cool kids do. When it came time to sing happy birthday, the entire class said "happy birthday to" then forgot my name. Except my teacher. She said Steve. My name's Jeff. FML

Today, I was looking over some old notes from high school when I came across a list of things I wanted to accomplish by the time I'm 25. I haven't accomplished a single one. I'm 26. FML

Today, I was scolding my 8 year old son because he was getting bad grades in school. I told him that he should get straight A's like his friend Ceejay. He told me that comparing him to Ceejay was unfair and when I asked why he said, "Because his dad is actually smart." FML

Today, I was sitting at my college campus, there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML

Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman says "nice dog" and without thinking I respond, "you too." FML

Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML

FML (Click to enter) is one website that I visit everyday, there are some really funny things
going on there, I think I'm a sadist sometimes, laughing at ppl's mishap. =X
I thought it's a pretty funny site, until I chanced upon MLIA(Click to enter), which is like the sequel to FML. I think I <3 MLIA more now.

MLIA
Today I drank some Orange Juice after I brushed my teeth. It tasted funny at first but after a while it tasted normal. MLIA.

Today, my pencil point broke during a huge test. There was no pencil sharpener in the room. I had a mechanical pencil, so I just kept going. MLIA

My high school's prom is today. Nobody asked me and I'm not going. It's okay because I graduated two years ago. MLIA.

Today, my contact fell out and I couldn't see. So, I put it back in and I could see again. MLIA

Today, I woke up with a man in my bed. It's okay though, it was my husband.

Today, I ran out of toothpaste. But then I squeezed harder and a little bit came out. MLIA

Today, I ran with scissors. I lived. MLIA.

Today the doctor told me that I would never be pregnant. I am a guy. MLIA.

Today I bought a carton of eggs without checking for cracks. When I got home and checked, none of them were cracked. MLIA.

Today, I rushed to the hospital. I work there. MLIA

Today, I forgot to put my phone on silent during class. No one called me anyway. MLIA

Today I witnessed a double homicide. But it was on TV. MLIA

Today, I forgot to tie my shoes. Then I realized I had no laces, so it was okay. MLIA

Today, as I created an account for this site it said “lowercase only” underneath the email section. I typed it in all caps to see if it would still work. It did. MLIA

Today, I accidentally spelled my last name wrong on a test. I was using pencil though, so I erased it and spelled it correctly. MLIA.

Today, no one wished me a happy birthday. I wasn't suprised, today isn't my birthday. MLIA.

Today my friend told me a joke. I didn't get the joke. I thought about it for a little and i got it. MLIA


& also, to MICHELLE LIM HUI GEK,
A SHARK IS A FISH :D



edited at 4.38pm,
I think Im going to pasir ris for bbq later, but the weather looks bad now.
Hope the sun will come out now!!
& damnit, I nvr thought I will repeat "insomnia" by Wheesung until
Nat sent me the song, it's like I dont like this kind of song in the past one leh!